Sin and the Sinner... What Do We Do With That?

We say that we 'love the sinner, and hate the sin,' but what does that mean?

Why do we hate the sin? For the sake of hating sin? I think if that's the case, we're missing the point.

Does God hate sin for the sake of hating sin? Is he holy for the sake of making a bunch of rules and judgments?

I don't think so. I think he hates anything that hurts us, that has the potential to cause us harm. I think he wants us 'to be holy as he is holy' for our sake, to keep us from harmful activities, thought processes, etc.  I think he hates whatever hurts us. Why? Because he loves us that much.

Is this our motivation for hating sin? Because our love for others causes us to hate anything that could cause another person harm or keep them from being whole, happy, healthy? Or do we hate sin because 'the Bible says so,' yet we never stop to wonder why it might say that. I believe God has a very practical side to him, and I don't think we consider that as much as we should.

Personally, I think a lot of people who say, 'love the sinner, hate the sin,' don't know what the crap they mean by that. I think too many people abuse that, use it as a cop-out. Some, if they were honest, would have to admit that what they're really interested in is hating the sin and berating the sinner. I think sometimes we do that out of our own insecurities. We feel we don't measure up so we deflect and put the spotlight on others' shortcomings so maybe people won't notice our own.

If we really love, if our motivation is love, we need to demonstrate that love. That's not always easy. It's not always a clear path either. It can be messy. It can be confusing. It can be frustrating to live in the tension, in the gray. I say gray because as I get older, I realize life is not as black and white as I was taught it was. There is a lot of gray in the world. I can also say that it seems easy to 'hate a sin,' but the moment you put a face to it...well, it gets a little harder. At least it should. You realize that the sin is attached to a person, and that person needs love, understanding and mercy, not judgement. That's when it gets really messy. And it should. We should have to wrestle with that. It shouldn't be easy.

So why do you really hate the sin? And in what ways do you show the sinner love? And here's another question...is it really a sin or is it just something you don't like or participate in? I've come to realize that some of the things I grew up being taught were sins weren't really sins at all according to Scriptures but were personal convictions that someone placed on everyone else and labeled as sins.

Actually this post is not new. I've had it in my draft folder for quite some time, but I realized that it's a recurring theme in my unpublished posts. Guess it's time to get it out there. I've said this a lot...and been criticized a lot for what I'm about to say, but here it is nonetheless: We struggle with the balance between mercy and judgement; but if we must err, let us err on the side of mercy.

Hope Discovers The Action of Non-Action

My husband is not a complicated man, yet he perplexes me and has done so for years.

I am a woman of action in most circumstances. If something needs to be said, I say it. Since I don't have much of a filter, that gets me into trouble sometimes, but at least the elephant in the room gets a 'shout out.' If something needs to be done, I don't wait for permission. I get to work. Sometimes I get bogged down because I see so many things that need my attention, but at least someone is doing something.

And then there's that laid-back, go-with-the-flow husband of mine who sometimes seems blissfully ignorant of the stress and problems that surrounds us. He's calm. He's patient. He smiles. He's content. He listens. He considers.

He doesn't react. And that has driven me crazy for years! To say that I have been befuddled is quite the understatement. I am animated enough for the both of us I suppose, but in some of the circumstances we've been in, I just could not understand for the life of me how he could just NOT react!

And then I met a Hindu and a Buddhist while in college in my religious studies courses. And I began to understand. Now I am no expert on these religions. Not even close. But over the course of a couple of semesters, I came to understand a little bit about the action of non-action. In Christianity, we have a similar teaching for this. James 1:19 says, "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."

It's not non-action. It doesn't mean you don't do anything because you're lazy and apathetic. It's more like the 'action of non-action.' It takes discipline. It takes practice...for some of us, more than others. It takes a conscious decision. And it can be powerful.

My husband and I actually put this into practice together a while back. We had a situation arise, and we both made the decision to not engage. We chose to take the course of non-action. He took the lead because he is the more experienced one in this area. And I was simply astounded! I watched as situations unfolded and worked themselves out. There were times I wanted to intervene, but I chose not to. I did vent to some trusted friends, though. The weight of the world did not rest on my shoulders, and my stress level was minimal. It worked itself out before my very eyes! Now I prayed like crazy during this time, but chose not to act because it wasn't the right thing to do here.

Now is this how things normally happen when you choose the action of non-action? I don't know. I am new to this. Does this mean you should never react? I don't think so. I think there is a balance. I think discernment is needed.

As I look back on my parenting style, I realize I kind of did this with my kids. There were many times, I didn't react. I stepped back and let them learn on their own. I let them realize there were consequences to their actions. I let them learn responsibility. I let them learn social skills. But there were times I had to intervene. It took some practice, but I eventually learned when to act and when not to. My kids have turned out pretty good. I can't complain. I really can't.

So maybe I'm not too bad at this action of non-action after all, but I still don't hold a candle to my husband. There is hope for me, though I don't see myself choosing the action of non-action when I witness the injustices of referees on a basketball court. Baby steps. One thing photography has taught me is that I don't have to know everything or be perfect at everything, I just have to be better than last week. I think I might can manage that.

To actively act or to non-actively act...yes, that is the question. God, grant me the wisdom to know when to apply each in my life.

Meet Hoyt

This is Hoyt. He is a member of my church, New Beginning Worship Center of Macon, Georgia. I love this man! And he is one of my favorite people to photograph.

He loves to tell stories. He often talks about the two loves of his life. He was married to one woman a little over 20 years and another for 25. Hoyt is in his 80s from what I can gather, and he cherishes his independence.

Hoyt prays for this church. He prays during the week, and he comes early every Sunday evening to pray. He prays for specific needs, he prays for my husband and our family, and he prays that God will send people to our church. He also acts on those prayers.

Last week, Hoyt showed up early as usual for church, but this time he had a basketball with him. He was at Walmart and saw the aisle with basketballs and decided to buy one for my kids and all the others that God is going to send us. "Kids need something to play with. That's why I bought it. When they come, I want them to stay and play."

He then proceeded to put me to shame in a quick game of basketball. I bricked three shots in a row before making my first one. He made his first three. I quit. Apparently, my kids did not get their affinity for basketball from their mother.

 

Here are two more of my favorites. The black and white photo was taken at our church Christmas party. Hoyt was sporting his Christmas tie.

I took the other photo at our church New Year's party. I had already put away my camera, and I was playing a game with some of the women. I turned around to see Hoyt pushing this little cutie around, and I ran and grabbed my camera. You should have heard them both laughing and having a good time. Hoyt loves kids. He just wanted to make this little guy happy, so he put down his cane and pushed this toy car around in circles for probably 10 minutes. It was one of the sweetest things!

Hoyt is very thoughtful and caring. I mentioned that he prays for my hubby and our family. It's true. I've heard him during Sunday evening prayer ask God to bless us and protect us. He talks to my kids. He brought boxes of chocolates for everyone the Sunday after Valentine's Day. He bought that basketball for my kids and those who are yet to come. He opens doors and greets people as they enter the church. He's taken my hubby and me out for Sunday lunch. He calls me 'baby' when hugs me and tells me he loves me. This is a precious man. The world needs more like him. He just loves people. It doesn't matter who they are or what they've done. He loves us all.

A New Journey

It's been over a year since I quit blogging. That was interesting and strange for me. I've been sharing my life online for quite some time, and then I just...quit. Part of me didn't really feel like sharing anymore. The other part wanted to try something different.

When I first started my journey to wholeness, I turned to writing songs. Words were not enough. I also needed music to make sense of the turmoil that was going on inside me. A few years later, I felt trapped by rhyme and meter. I turned to blogging. And a few months ago, during my year or so away from blogging, I switched to photography.

I guess I've felt whole, comfortable in my own skin, at peace, totally ok with myself. I'm a little spunkier, a little more aware, a little more inquisitive about life and religion and philosophy, and a lot more curious about God and how he and I fit together. I think I chose photography (or maybe it chose me) because I began seeing the world differently. I saw beauty in what others might consider unsightly. I saw conquering spirit when others saw pain. Everything fascinated me, and I just got this urge to capture it all with my camera. My favorites are the little moments between the poses when people show a glimpse of their true selves.

I love photography, and I am not giving that up any time soon. I feel amazing when I'm behind a camera!

However, I think I'm back to blogging again. This time though it's not because I'm trying to release the pain and anguish churning inside me. It's because I've started another journey...the rest of my life.

My hubby and I are back into ministry. If you've read some of my blogs, then you know that organized religion had a lot to do with the mess I was in, so it seems crazy that I'd return to ministry. Yeah, it was easy just attending church for a while, but something happened. I don't even know when really. I'm sure I'll get blindsided and sucker-punched again before it's all said and done, but this time it's different. I am different.

So I'm a 'pastor's wife.' Not sure about that label, but that's a post for another day. I just couldn't get away from ministry because as much as 'the church' drives me crazy, I love it dearly and want to see it made whole and live up to its potential.

I've updated my skill set. I got a degree in public relations. And while I was at college, I got to know a lot of different people there. God opened my eyes to many things. And he opened my heart.

Here I am again. Ready to share again. And now I begin my new journey. Not a journey of trying to get out of a deficit to living at par, but a journey of discovery and living beyond.

Be Great, Crusaders!

Crusaders are GISA AA Region Champs

We’ve all wondered at one time or another how one team with standout talent can lose to another team with lesser talent. And though there may be a number of reasons for a loss here or there like injuries, off-nights or poor officiating, more than likely if you look closely, you’ll see that it’s a matter of teamwork.

Teamwork means that each person puts aside egos and agendas, puts aside the thought of game stats, puts aside the desire for personal glory, puts aside the turnover or missed shot on the last play.

Teamwork means going to practice with the mentality that “what I do in practice is what I’ll do in the game, so I’m going to practice doing it right.” Teamwork means learning the plays, flowing together, and getting the ball into the hands of the open player for an easy basket. Teamwork means digging deep when you feel like you can’t run the length of the court one more time. Teamwork means giving the ball up or even sitting out because someone else is playing a better game that night. Teamwork means practicing some more even after the official practice has ended.

I believe in the power of teamwork. And although teamwork is about working together as a team, it’s also very much about each individual playing to the best of his ability and demonstrating character both on and off the court.

Each person has to be at his best so that the team can be at its best.

So here we are, Crusaders. We made it to the state Final Four again, and we’re about to face the biggest games of our 2012-2013 season. We’re down a player, but we’ve already proven we have the heart and talent to fight through it for the win.  That’s why we’re still standing.

It takes good coaching and good playing to be a championship team. But in order to earn the title and the right to cut down the net, you each have to be great.

You see, a good player makes himself look good, but a great player makes the team look good.

So as you step out onto the court this week whether in practice or in game, in every shot, in every play, in every pass, in every run down the court, in every thought you think, in every word you speak, be great. And not just in basketball. In a few days, win or lose, the games will end and the season will be over. But don’t forget to apply the lessons learned on the court to your life and to your future. No matter what you do or where you go, wherever God and this life take you, always remember to be great.

Whatcha Carrying?

Pic borrowed from ivyleagueinsecurities.com

I've come to realize that in every circumstance there is both good and bad. The good I always try to take with me. The bad? Well, I do my best to leave the bad behind while taking with me the lessons learned, the things that make me a better person.

We carry stuff everywhere we go. This stuff can be a help or a hindrance.

Take for instance when we go on a trip. We bring along our luggage. We carry the things we need, things to make that trip easy, enjoyable and relaxing. This is good stuff to carry.

In life, we carry luggage like this, too. It aids us in making the most of life. It is good. It is a help and not a hindrance.

But so much of the time I tend to focus on baggage, the negative stuff that weighs me down and keeps me from living life.

It's like this. When we leave a situation, especially in a hurry, we tend to pack up everything. As we get settled into our new surroundings, we start going through the packages and determine what can stay and what needs to go.

Sometimes it takes a while to leave behind the things that need to stay in the past. It does for me.

I've decided that while addressing the stuff that needs to go is good and necessary, I also need to pay more attention to the stuff that needs to go with me into my new situations. I have a lot of good, a lot of lessons, a lot of experiences I can share with others.

Both the good and the bad have made me into the person that I am, but I feel like I need to start focusing more on the good luggage. I've ignored it for too long, and focusing on ridding myself of the bad baggage quite honestly hasn't made it go away any faster.

These are my thoughts based on the book Pause by Chris Maxwell. I hope you check it out!

Authenticity is a Gift

picture from thegospelcoalition.org

In the chapter about balancing in Chris Maxwell's book Pause, Chris talks about being challenged by a favorite author of his to live in a spiritual family, a community where reconciliation, forgiveness, encouragement and companionship are common. 'A gathering of the forgiven choosing to forgive. Of those who've been hurt refusing to remain angry. Of the abused becoming healed. Of the bitter becoming nice.'

I'm not going to lie. I had a tough time with this chapter. Here's why. Most of my hurt and bitterness have come at the hands of 'church.' For a time, I left 'church.' My family gathered in our home for our time with God. It was a safe place, and I took more responsibility for my spiritual health which was a good thing. And our spiritual fellowship changed.

But we grew up in the Bible belt, and you're supposed to go to a church for church. Eventually, we found a church home again. I am very cautious and slow to get involved and open up. It's not that I expect church to be perfect, but I do expect it to be authentic.

We all screw up. Nobody's perfect. Perfection is a myth.

But being authentic whether for good or for bad makes me feel at ease. I know where I stand. And I think authenticity is a sign of love, honor and trust bestowed to others.  It's a gift.

I'm the first to admit that I'm not perfect. I have a little crazy in me. I have shortcomings and quirks. And sometimes a not-so-nice word flies passed my lips. I know...GASP!!!  It's true. Just giving the gift of authenticity because I love you!

I'm trying to be the person God wants me to be. And I just try to be real about it. And I want people to feel like they can be real around me. I'd rather be around someone who lets a nasty little four-letter word fly than be around someone spouting religious platitudes because nine times out of ten, I've found the platitude thing to be disingenuous.

I would love to go to a church like the one described above, but I think the only way to accomplish that is for people to just be authentic. No pretenses. No masks. Just people being people. Wonderful yet flawed. And okay with it, yet desiring and working towards being whole. Being better. Oh, and you need a lot, a lot of grace. A lot.

The question I have to ask myself is if I am willing to do that.

And to be honest, I'm still working on it. It's a leap of faith these days, so it's a little scary. I need to get in touch with my adventurous side and learn to jump again. The good thing is that I have just enough crazy to take a running start and go for it.

What Hinders My Relationships

My response to a question posted by Chris Maxwell in the section "Adding" in his new book Pause. I hope you will take the time to check out his book and testimony.

Question: What hinders or prevents you from making new friends and adding new activities to your life?

The good thing about not having any money is that you know people aren't friends with you because of it. We used to have money when my husband was a nuclear engineer, but we felt God was calling us in a different direction, so we walked away from the comfort and lifestyle we enjoyed for a simpler and more modest one.

At least I thought it would be simpler. My husband went into ministry. And suddenly we had a lot more friends. That is until the honeymoon phase was over. I found out quickly that when someone is upset with your minister husband or another minister on staff or a church board decision, sometimes they take it up with the wife and sometimes they take it out on the wife. Long story short, my friends list got a little shorter.

When we left ministry, the same thing happened again. Come to find out, a good number of those people I thought were my friends were not attracted to me, but rather they were attracted to our position. Thankfully, they weren't all like that. Some didn't abandon us at all. And sometimes it was understandably more a case of 'out of sight, out of mind.'

I thought things would be different when my husband went into education and athletics, but little has changed.

It's difficult to know who your real friends are.

Experience is teaching me to keep people at a distance. This is hard for me because I'm pretty open and trusting, yet I find it a necessity in order to keep my sanity and to keep from getting depressed or discouraged.

I don't have much of a problem adding new activities in my life, but I struggle adding new friends. What hinders me are things like a lack of trust, past hurts, the possibility of future disappointments, fear of being used and rejected.

It's not that I don't want to add friends. I do. But I'm tired. Tired of going home and licking my wounds because someone liked me last week and snubbed me this week. Tired because someone laughed with me last week and snarked at me this week. Tired because someone understood last week and judged me this week.

This sometimes causes me to seem moody, and sometimes I sit alone. I like for people to like me, so it's difficult for me when people don't. It's even more difficult when there's nothing I can do about it. So sometimes I act a little weird and standoffish even to those I can trust. I'm sorry if I push people away sometimes. I don't like that, but sometimes my heart doesn't know what else to do.

I can't change what others do, but I can change how I react to it.

I am going to hold onto the hope and the promise that there are people out there who like me for me. The others are just missing out. I just hope I don't push away the good ones because of my fear of the other ones.

So that's what hinders me.

Acceptance

In Chris Maxwell's book, Pause, he asks us to look in the mirror and accept the person looking back and to look through our neighborhoods and accept the people nearby.

Acceptance...this is both easy and difficult for me.

When I decided to go back to school and get my degree, I wondered if I'd be accepted. I chose Georgia State University in downtown Atlanta not just because it offered a degree in public relations but because of the diversity the school offered.

Not everyone looked, thought or acted like I did. Nor did they look, think or act like everyone else I'd ever known. I was fascinated, though at times a little scared and insecure. But I soon learned that it was easy to accept them. They made it easy. They openly accepted me.

I made friends easily and accepted into my social circle people of different faiths, ideologies, orientations and cultures. They made me a better person. I hope they can say the same about me.

Accepting others nearby is the easier one. Accepting the person in the mirror...now that's a bit of a challenge.

I read a while back that part of integrity is acceptance. Acceptance of both the good and the not-so good about ourselves. When we accept all of who we are, we are integrated. We have integrity. Integrity is not a lofty ideal. It is...realness.

In general, I like who I am. But I have difficulty accepting some things about myself. I don't particularly care for the way I look. I get easily discouraged when it comes to my weight. I learned at a young age to associate happiness and success with thinness. That thinking has messed me up on many occasions. There are some things I need to change and other things I need to accept.

I don't like my relationship with God right now. My faith is on a roller coaster complete with ups, downs and loops. It's hard to trust when all is silent, when the doors are closed, when the darkness surrounds. I'm fighting to trust and fighting to believe. I'm fighting to accept. To help, I have a picture on my Facebook page that reminds me not to confuse God's patience with his absence.

Chris reminds me in his chapter about acceptance that I need to accept and experience life and all its abundances. And that reminds me of the Serenity Prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. 

Chris Maxwell's book Pause

Learning to Pause

" In our efforts to reach  our desires we often miss what we desire the most. Let's change that.

Let's pause.

Let's read the words.

Let's experience a better life in the normal, in the usual, in the hurt, in the questions.

Let's see the wonder. One word at a time."

These are not my words, but they are what I desire.
These words come from my friend Chris Maxwell in his most recent book, Pause.

I want to be a better person, and Chris always inspires and challenges me to be that better person. I feel so blessed to have him as a friend. I can't tell you how many times I've needed prayer and encouragement, and the next thing I know I'm getting a text or message from him. He has a way of guiding and leading and nudging that leaves me feeling encouraged, like I can accomplish big things. I never once have felt judged or like I don't measure up when I'm around him.

I want to experience a better life. I want to take the good and learn from the bad. I want peace. I want to help others be happy, be better, be whole.

I want to see the wonder. Chris always reminds people to enjoy the journey. I've heard it enough times that it has now become part of who I am. I consciously take time to notice things as I go through life. It's not always about the destination. I know that now.

I love to brag on my friends. And that's one reason I'm writing this now. I really want people to check out his new book. But I'm also writing this because as I've been reading his book, I have a million thoughts running through my head that I need to write down. So I'm using this as an introduction to future posts.

Chris takes one word at a time, shares his stories, thoughts and feelings, and then leaves the reader with three takeaways: reflect, receive, and respond. I've been reflecting and receiving. Now I want to respond and share a little of my personal journey.

So stay tuned. There is more to come. Perhaps my journey will inspire you on yours.

In the meantime, check out Chris Maxwell's book Pause. Clink on the link below the picture to learn more about his book and about him personally. He has a wonderful story.

Chris Maxwell's Pause

Abstract Thinking - I Do That Well

The heart of an artist is fearless. It dares to dream and envision. It looks beyond the way things seem and sees what others cannot.

I am naturally an abstract thinker.

According to wiseGEEK.com, 'the abstract thinker can conceptualize or generalize, understanding that each concept can have multiple meanings. Such thinkers might see patterns beyond the obvious and be able to use patterns or a variety of concrete ideas or clues to solve larger problems.'

This is one of the things I really, really like about myself, and this definition describes me well. As a result, I'm able to dream  and envision things that others don't or won't or can't.

I've been in a bit of a dark place lately. Trying to find a job can be frustrating and filled with disappointments, especially when you know you can do the job if someone would only give you the chance.

Unfortunately, 'abstract thinker' doesn't seem to be on employers' radars, but it definitely makes me a better volunteer, employee, student, wife, mother, woman...

But at the moment, a job is not what I'm focused on. After a few rejections, I just need to remind myself that I am good enough, that I have a lot to offer and that I have some wonderful qualities.

And that's the reason for this post. I needed to focus on me...and what I do well.

Somebody's going to see me and what I have to offer, and they're going to be smart enough to say, "You're hired." It wouldn't hurt if they added that they're going to pay me an exorbitant amount of money because I'm just so darn awesome!

Meanwhile, I'm just going to get my thinking back on track.

Stay positive. Believe. Give. Be fearless.

I'm Sinking, and I Can't Rise Up

God,

Remember that time a few years ago when I sang this song to you?

Lord, I believe in You
I'll always believe in You
Though I cant see you with my eyes
Deep in my heart
Your presence I find
Lord, I believe in You
And I'll keep my trust in You
Let the whole world say what they may
No one can take this joy away
Lord, I believe 

I must confess. Instead of walking on water, I feel like I'm sinking. Doubt, rejection and disappointment are starting to pull me under. I'm struggling to hold onto my trust and joy. I feel them slipping out of my hands. I so desperately need to find your presence again. I don't know why it eludes me. You, more than anyone else, know my struggles. I have been through enough to know you are near, but your silence really hurts my heart.

I want to trust that everything is as it should be, that you have a plan for me. I know I only see in part, that your ways are higher than my own. But it's getting more difficult each day to believe.

I need to know you're with me. I need to feel like you see me, like you understand my heart.

I don't need epic signs and wonders. Just a little whisper, a small assurance will do.

I'm still a little broken, so don't leave me hanging. You know how I get. =)

Me just being me,
Hope

To Matthew - Be Great!

My oldest son signs to play college basketball today.

I am unbelievably proud.

And it's not just because of his accomplishments on game days. I watched this child work day after day to become a better teammate and player. He had no off-season. Basketball was a year-round endeavor.

And it's not just because he worked hard to improve his basketball skills. I watched him mature and step into a leadership role. He earned the respect of both teammates and rivals.

And it's not just because he's a leader. I watched him dream. I was there with him at Georgia College and State University his junior year after his team had been knocked out of the playoffs when he looked around and said that his team would play for the state championship in that gym the next year.

And he was right. He took it on himself to make that happen. His team caught the dream, too, and together they accomplished something special. What a great season, and what a great team!

I've told Matthew often that a good player makes himself look good, but a great player makes the whole team look good.

I've thought he was great since he was a little kid playing rec league, when he was the quarterback of the Pebbles football team in Graniteville, South Carolina. They went undefeated that year. The last game of the season couldn't have ended better had it been scripted for a movie. The game was tied. Matthew handed the ball off, and with no time left on the clock, his teammate ran the ball into the end zone for the win.

At the awards ceremony, Matthew's coaches gave him the highest honor, the award called "Mr. Pebble" and remarked that they'd never seen a more selfless player. He made his team look good.

A few years later, Matthew found himself on one of two baseball teams in a little town in North Georgia. As politics would dictate, one of the teams was stacked. Matthew was one of the better players in the county and found himself on the favored team. Not surprisingly, a number of people were upset. So was Matthew. It bothered him so much that he asked permission to switch teams. I can't remember if that team won or lost that season. What I remember is Matthew donning his new uniform and winning the hearts of every momma out there, including myself. He not only made his team look good, he made me look good. I had raised a good kid.

And that leads me back where I began: Matthew leading his team on the 2012 GISA AAA state championship run. Most people never saw his year-round workouts. Most people never knew about the practices he called even when coaches couldn't be there. Or the conversations with teammates. Or the goofy raps on bus trips.

Points, assists, steals, rebounds. The measurement of these causes us to determine how good a player is.

But some things are less tangible like heart, passion, and composure. Put them together with the above, and you have a great player. Multiply that, and you have a great team.

So, my prayer for you, Matthew,  is that in basketball, in life, in relationships, wherever you are, be great. I'm so proud and excited for you. Your dreams are becoming reality.

Matthew: Realizing My Dream

This is what my son wrote for an essay about how he believes his college will help him with his career path. I'm really proud of him. 

Just starting out.

Senior year of HS

Being a basketball coach is something that I have wanted to do my whole life. I have played basketball pretty much since I was able to walk. My parents bought me a plastic basketball goal for little kids, and I have never stopped playing. This year, I led my high school team to the state championship game in GISA AAA division. Coaches and announcers kept calling me the leader of the team, and some even said I would make a good coach one day. And that is what I would like to become.

The college that I will be attending is Shorter University in Rome, Georgia. I think Shorter will help me in my journey to become a basketball coach. The coach offered me the opportunity play basketball for the school. I hope that by playing on the college level, I will become a better basketball player and learn more about the game. That’s what the assistant coach said that he did. I hope to follow a similar path.

After I graduate from college I want to become an assistant coach for Shorter University or another college. As an assistant I want to learn under a head coach and take everything he knows and apply it. I think the coaching staff at Shorter University is a good group to learn from. They are knowledgeable, and they care about basketball and the players. They also stress positive values. 

I hope by doing all of this, I will get to be a head basketball coach one day. By getting the chance to play college basketball, it opens the door for me to hopefully coach at the collegiate level. This college will specifically help me in what I want to become. If Shorter had not given me the chance to come to their school and play basketball, I may have missed out on a great opportunity to follow my dream.  I look forward to being a Hawk. I think I am learning from the best. I know I will get a great education from Shorter University both on and off the court. And I will be able to pass my knowledge, passion and values to other kids. I will help them reach their goals and become better people.

This scholarship is sponsored by CenturyLinkQuote.com.

To My Little Katybug

I had to write what I thought about my youngest daughter for her 8th grade scrapbook. She's such a wonderful little girl, so this was easy. Here it is...

Sometimes the best things in life are surprises.

No more babies.  That was my plan. I had three beautiful children, and I thought our family was finally complete. But God had other plans. He decided we weren’t quite finished yet, and he gave me a wonderful surprise – my sweet little Katybug.

Amazing. Kind. Generous. Athletic. Hardworking. Smart. Bubbly. Positive. These are just a few words to describe my baby girl. Katy is rarely seen without a smile, she has a good heart, and she doesn’t let circumstances or people get her down. She surprises me everyday with her abilities, her humor and her sweet personality.

I’m glad that God sometimes ignores our plans. I’m glad that sometimes he has something better in mind. Not a day goes by that I don’t thank him for little suprises. Not a day goes by that I don’t thank him for my little Katybug.

Just Say Yes

The world needs more people who find ways to make things happen instead of people who find  reasons to say no.

The world needs more people who actually give a crap, who care and are willing to make sacrifices to achieve greatness.

And the world needs more people with dreams.

Helen Keller is credited with saying, "The most pathetic person in the world is someone who has sight but has no vision."

I was in my twenties sitting in a room with hundreds of others like me at a leadership conference in Atlanta when I realized that one of my biggest fears as a leader was getting older and losing my sense of adventure. I remember looking up and begging God to help me so that I would never lose my ability to dream, to learn, to say "yes." 

Now that I'm in my late thirties, I smile when I think back to that day. It seems that my prayer has been answered. I question and dream more than I used to, and I am proud to say that I'm also more adventurous than I used to be. 

And though my sight is becoming a little fuzzier, my vision is as sharp as it's ever been.

My brain may be getting older, but I pray my thinking never does.

A little parting wisdom for us all: Make things happen, give a crap, and dare to dream.

And the Journey Continues

Life goes on, and so must I.

I considered starting a more professional blog and ending this one. Then I thought better of it. I just can't walk away from this. I know...I haven't posted anything since January of this year, but that's OK. We all need a break sometimes. 

Quite honestly, I was just busy living life. It was awesome! And I have so many stories to tell.

So stay tuned...I can't wait to start sharing my journey again.

By the way, I'm happy to announce that I graduate with honors in a few days from Georgia State University with a degree in journalism/public relations. Oh, happy day!

Today is my Resolution

A resolution is a firm decision to do or not to do something, the act or process of resolving. Guess most of our resolutions turn out to not be so firm. Mine are far from firm. In fact, they're just plain...mushy.

I love new beginnings. I dare say that no one loves making New Year's resolutions more than I, but my track record with them is not so great. And I know the reason why. My response when faced with the decision to follow through with my resolution is...tomorrow. Not exactly what one would consider resolve.

Although my resolutions have been "epic fails," I'm not ready to give up on them. So I've decided this year's resolution is to give up my response of  "tomorrow" and instead resolve to say, "today."

I read last night in Entreleadership by Dave Ramsey that one of the most important things to do with our goals is to write them down. So, there. It is written. This year I resolve to say...today.

With that being said, I'm off to my first "today" thing. And nope...not going to spill the beans just yet.

I pray that 2012 is our best year yet. Face it with grace! Happy New Year, everyone!

This beautiful pic can be found at http://www.williamsportmd.gov/images/fireworks4.jpg.

Have Mercy

There is a time to lovingly speak truth, and there is a time to shut up and show mercy. Mercy and judgement have always been difficult for us Christians. We tend to fall into extremes. That's human nature. 

I've said for years that if I am to err, I should err on the side of mercy. The merciful will obtain mercy, and the measure in which you judge others will be the measure in which you will be judged. I'm not perfect. We all fall short. And whoever is without sin...go ahead...cast the first stone.

According to a recent study, the church is considered to be judgmental in general and to be hateful towards people who live alternative lifestyles. We Christians are called to live holy and righteous personal lives. We are also called to show love and respect to others. 

Yes, we sometimes need tough love and to also give that tough love to others, but we are not called to be others' holy spirit. There is one already that has the responsibility to guide and convict, and he does it much better than we can. 

Because we are loving and merciful, we desire to share life and truth with others, but we cannot and should not force our way onto others. God gives us free will. Who are we to not allow others that same free will? 

I try to live a holy life because I love and respect God and others around me. I try to show mercy to those who, like myself, fall short and struggle. And I think it is perfectly biblical to teach and advocate mercy, love, grace and forgiveness, just as it is biblical to teach about sin, repentance and hell. 

I'm a little bothered because of all the things I've read and heard over the past few months from Christians who have chosen to speak so much judgement and so little mercy. 

God is love, and with that love comes an element of holiness as well as mercy. In my years of life and ministry, I have found it is often much easier to try to make others be holy, and it is so much harder to live honestly and transparently and with mercy and forgiveness. 

Lately, I have found myself asking God what the Gospel was intended to be before we Christians got a hold of it and transformed it into what we have now. I desire to find that pure, unadulterated Good News that Jesus lived and taught. I pray that I can live out the great command to love God with everything in me and to love people as I love myself. 

The older I get, the more I realize I have to learn, the further I have to go. God, may you continue to increase in my life, and may my way and will continue to decrease...until everything I am resembles you.

a new journey is beginning...and it's all good

I am not the same person I used to be. I have always struggled with self esteem. I have struggled with making decisions, sharing an opinion, speaking my mind, assessing my worth.

I am not that woman anymore. That wounded, unsure, fearful person has blossomed into a confident, emotionally healthy, adventurous one.

I am about to enter into a new phase of my life. In May 2012, I will graduate from Georgia State University with  a degree in Journalism/Public Relations and will emerge a career woman.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous. OK...truth be told, I'm stressed to the point that my facial tic is back. Dern that eye twitch!

Seriously though, my cup runneth over. I don't know what the future holds, but I am excited about it nonetheless.

I caught myself saying the other day that I'm good at what I do. Those words coming from my mouth to my ears surprised me. I've never felt this confident before. 

I thank God for those he has strategically placed in my path. I thank God for a supportive family. I even thank God for my struggles. All this has led me to where I am now.

You know, in Genesis, every time God finished a phase in his creation, he ended it by saying that it was good. Well, I'm gonna follow his lead.

As I finish up this phase of my life, I must say (in the Hammond family way)...like gravy on a biscuit, baby, it's all good...it's all good!


that cute pic came from ...http://tulsafood.com/talk/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/I-HEART-BISCUITS-GRAVY.jpg